July 8, 2009

Roswell, let's put you on the map!

July 8, 1947, radios around the world broadcast the exciting news that a UFO has been discovered in Roswell, leading to an immediate response from Egyptian radio saying, "bullshit, Ra didn't have a well, and besides, it would be retarded for anybody to fly any object, identified or not, inside of a well," leading to another immediate response from American radio saying "no you idiot, Roswell, a small city in New Mexico which from this point forward will gain a tourist industry consisting primarily of Art Bell's audience, who is Art Bell? you'll soon find out, thank you, but we understand your confusion, ha ha, ha." The thing about UFOs is that any drunk will tell you that anything can be unidentified as long as you don't know what it is. No, LISTEN, think about it! What if I built a hot air balloon and painted a giant melty face on it, NO, a giant melty MONKEY face on it, then what would you think? Would you know what it is?

oh yeah, I belatedly apologize in advance for the laziness of our blog, mostlyneverkins... we'll try to get caught up sooner than later and the world can be nice and warm and snuggly again until 2012, when the sky starts falling.

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