National Day of Prayer

The National Day of Prayer is a US tradition where people of various belief systems are asked to come together and pray, especially for the well being of their country. The first instance was in 1775, when the Continental Congress was working together to form the United States, and asked the people of the 13 colonies for their prayers to help in forming a new nation, and also for the witches to cast special magic to protect our new land from the warlocks of evil. It was a floating holiday, designated by the acting president for years, until Ronald Reagan decided in 1988 that it would take place on the first Thursday of May each year.

The National Day of Reason is another US tradition which happens to fall on the same day as the National Day of Prayer! The National Day of Reason honors the firm belief that church and state should not dance pretty together in the streets of congress, and nicely tries to point out that these crying Christians with their magic clasped hands and undelivered communications are really only seeking to serve their own faith and give it more relevance than it already doesn't have. Their proof: The National Day of Prayer task force, a non-governmental organization seeking to coordinate events within the evangelical communities. "BS!" cry the Reasonettes.

The National Day of Magic is a fictional holiday founded by the best magic wizards this side of Hogwarts school of awesome spells. This holiday also falls on the first Thursday of May and is celebrated with great gusto by my friends and I and a 12 pack of beer, and our books of magic (the new ones that my mom printed because the old ones got kool-aid on them). We didn't want to let witches in at first but my mom said we had to, so now we do, and they're actually really nice people when they aren't making curses that make you fart when you walk or turn into a donkey.

America, the time is now: PRAY / REASON / CAST A SPELL!